The questions below get a family recipe out of someone's head and onto a page you can cook from: where the dish came from, what the handful really weighs, how they know it is done, and the story that belongs in the margin. Print this page, or keep it open on your phone, and work through it in the kitchen while the dish is being made.
Before you start, tell the cook what you are making and who will see it, and ask whether they are comfortable with their recipe, their words and any photos appearing in a family binder that relatives can open by link, and in a printed copy.
Before the interview
- Pick one dish per session. An hour on one recipe beats ten minutes on six.
- Ask to cook it together, on a day they would make it anyway.
- Bring measuring cups and spoons, a kitchen scale if you have one, and a phone for photos and a voice memo.
- Ask if there is a card, a clipping or a cookbook page, and photograph it front and back.
1. Where the recipe came from
- What do you call this dish? Does anyone else call it something different?
- Who taught it to you, and how old were you?
- Has it changed since then? What did you change, and why?
- Is there a written card, clipping or cookbook it came from?
- Whose name should go beside it in the book?
2. Ingredients and real measurements
- Can we measure each handful, pinch or splash as you add it today?
- Which brand, cut or variety do you buy, and does it matter?
- How big are "two onions" or "a can"? Can we weigh them?
- Does any ingredient need to be at room temperature, cold or ripe?
- What substitutions have you actually tried, and which ones didn't work?
- How many people does this feed, in the pan you normally use? What size is that pan?
Write the spoken words and the measured amount side by side: "a good knob of butter [2 tbsp, 28 g]". The words are hers; the brackets are yours. The butter converter and cups to grams converter help when the answer is "half a stick" or "a teacup".
3. Method, and how they know
- What do you do first, even before the stove goes on?
- Which pan, pot or bowl do you use, and does it change the result?
- What heat, and for how long? What are you watching for?
- How should it look, smell, sound or feel at each stage?
- How do you know it's done?
- Where do people usually go wrong with this?
- What did you leave out when you wrote it down, because you just know it?
- Can it be made ahead? How long does it keep, and how do you reheat it?
4. The story
- When is this dish made: a holiday, a birthday, a Sunday, when someone is sick?
- Who always asks for it?
- Who did you first make it for?
- What's your earliest memory of eating it?
- Is there a saying, a warning or a joke that goes with it?
- Is there anything about this story you would rather keep out of the book?
5. Permission before sharing
- May I write this recipe down and edit it so others can follow it?
- May it go in the family binder that relatives can open by link?
- May it appear in printed copies?
- May I include your name, your handwriting or a photo of you?
- Would you like to read your page before anyone else sees it?
After the interview
The same day, write the recipe up while you still remember the details, in the format from how to write a recipe. Read it back to the cook and mark anything missing as a question for next time: a quantity, a temperature, a spelling. Never fill a gap from another recipe; a blank is a follow-up, not permission to guess.
Then give the recipe its own sheet in the family recipe book, with the story as a margin note and the photo of the card beside it, and share the link with the cook so they can check their page.
Questions
What should I ask my grandmother about her recipes?
Who taught her the dish, what she calls it, the real amounts behind each handful, which pan she uses, how she knows it's done, when the family eats it, and whether you may share it. The five sections above cover all of it.
Should I record the interview?
A voice memo helps you catch details later, but ask first. Write the recipe up the same day, while you still remember what she meant.
How do I write down a recipe that has no measurements?
Measure what the cook does as she does it, with real spoons or a scale, and write it next to her words: "a pinch of salt [about ¼ tsp]". Cook it again from your notes to check.
What if the cook doesn't want a recipe shared?
Keep it private. A forever.recipes binder is private until you choose to share it by link, so a recipe can be saved for you alone.
By forever.recipes